life, love, and maybe babies

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

The Pregnancy Symptoms Post: AKA I Didn't Have Any

I like to believe I'm a smart gal when it comes to my body. After all, I've had it for 33 years. For example, I know that when a particular part of my hand starts to ache, I'm destined for a cold or stomach bug. When my big toe pops a lot, I'm super dehydrated. When my right side feels funky and twinges, ovulation is just around the corner.

With all of my expert knowledge surrounding my body and its weird signals, I was confident that when I finally became pregnant, I would KNOW it. After all, for 48+ months, I documented every cramp, hiccup, sore breast and frequent pee I experienced. And for 48+ months, no pregnancy resulted.

To me, the logical assumption was that the month when a BFP did finally appear, I'd already be well aware of it. I read countless articles online, I asked friends, I asked seemed everyone knew they were pregnant the second it happened. I would hear the stories and think, this is what will happen for me. 

But it didn't. Because it doesn't work that way for everyone. In the spirit of speaking up for those of us who didn't see any signs they were pregnant, here are my top "I knew I was preggers" stories that I call total and complete BS on. (And some of them aren't BS, but can be misleading for those of us who symptom spot every second of the day.) 

1) The Psychic:  Hell yes, I knew. I felt it happen, I swear to God. I was laying there after, ya know, we did it, and I just knew. I can't explain it. 

Why you may not have it: Sorry, Miss Cleo. You can't explain why you knew because you flat out didn't know. No one does. Besides, implantation (which is possible to feel) doesn't happen until several days past ovulation. What you felt was likely indigestion from the lasagna you ate. 

Could it still be a sign I'm pregnant? Doubtful. However, hindsight is 20/20. After getting that plus test, you look back and remember allllll the times you even remotely suspected that it finally happened. Maybe on the night you and your Hubs got sideways you did have a little extra twinge of hope. That's believable. But no, no one feels conception happen the moment the egg meets the sperm. So don't get discouraged if you didn't "feel it."

2) The Boob Whisperer: Oh, I knew because my boobs were KILLING ME. Like, I could not even put a shirt on. Seriously, if your boobs hurt, that's the number one sign. 

Why you may not have it: Okay, this one is legit up to a point. A lot of women feel tenderness in their tata's and their nipples. But here's the thing - so do women that are PMS'ing. In addition, for those of us that are taking progesterone and patches and injections, those medications can also cause breast tenderness. It can go either way. And also, some women experience no pain in their breasts. Mother Nature can be such a crafty little bee-otch.

Could it still be a sign I'm pregnant? Yes, of course it could. Looking back (remember that whole "hindsight is 20/20 thing"), my little ladies were more sore than my average period. But nothing that made me feel like I AM TOTES PREGNANT. So don't freak if your boobies are just averagely sore - you still might be getting a plus sign.

3. The Sleeping Beauty: Oh girl, I was so tired I couldn't even climb a flight of stairs without passing out. I just wanted to sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep. I'm usually so active and full of energy! So I totally knew when I was that exhausted.

Why you may not have it: Trying to get pregnant is an exhausting proposition in and of itself, especially if you've been trying for awhile. Feeling out of energy is a sign of stress and frustration just as much as PMS or pregnancy can be. 

Could it still be a sign I'm pregnant? Absolutely. If you are pregnant, your body is starting to go through some major changes and that can wear you down. But it isn't the same for every person. For me, I felt a little tired (again, looking back), but certainly not exhausted to the point where I could barely function. Don't wig out if you aren't falling asleep during your morning commute. 

4. The Happy Cramper: I had these weird cramps a few days after I ovulated. They felt kind of like a weird pulling in my stomach. Way different from cramps. I knew that was implantation happening.

Why you may not have it: Personal opinion? I think implantation cramps are impossible to decipher from PMS cramps. Trust me, I just went through it. Now yes, everyone is different, but you have to remember that every one of the people telling you these stories are those that are looking back after they've experienced it. A math test makes way more sense if you have the answers right in front of you, right? Yes, it's true that many women feel implantation. It's also true that many women don't. Unfortunately, there's no way of telling which camp you'll fall into.

Could it still be a sign I'm pregnant? Yup. And this is what I want to shout from the rooftops. Everyone is different. Some women feel cramps, some feel zilch. If every women could tell she was pregnant immediately, we wouldn't have amazingly awful shows like "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant."

5. The Spotty McSpotterton: I had a little spotting a few days after ovulation. Just a little faint pink after I wiped. I knew it was implantation and I was pregnant!!!

Why you may not have it: Implantation spotting is a real thing. But it doesn't happen to everyone. I asked 10 friends who had experienced pregnancy if they ever spotted prior to a positive test. Two of them had. The other eight laughed at me.

Could it still be a sign I'm pregnant? Most definitely. Implantation spotting is a very tell tale sign that something is going on in there. However, that doesn't mean you should give up and throw yourself off a cliff if you don't experience it. Remember my 2 out of 10 friends. And myself! I never spotted. Not once. And I got a positive result.

The moral to this entire post should be glaringly obvious. Everyone experiences the days up to their positive pregnancy test differently. Think about how different all of us are. Tall, short, skinny, athletic, overweight, underweight, blonde, brunette - the list goes on. Do you really think we'll all feel the same effects when we get pregnant? No way.

As someone who relies on the internet to blog and connect, I don't want to discourage you from checking your symptoms against those on pregnancy threads. Just do it with the understanding that looking for symptoms that aren't there can be a real downer. Believe me, I experienced it. As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, I truly thought I would know when it happened because I assumed it would be so different from all the other failed months. But it wasn't. It was like any other month...except with a positive test at the end.

Even today, as I write this, I still have very few symptoms (let's hope I can keep that going for 8 more months). Could I be a weird case? Yeah, I could. But I think you'll find that a lot of people who had 'symptoms' of pregnancy didn't really realize that's what they were until after they found out they were pregnant.

So hang in there, my two week wait friend. Don't despair because your boobs aren't on fire or you aren't peeing every 38 seconds. If it's happening, it's happening and no amount of worrying is going to make it happen any faster. Hang tight and breathe in and out. You'll know soon enough and if you get a positive, we'll all be here cheering for you.

XOXO, friends!


Anonymous said...

Great post Kim! I'm in TWW right now. I have been more tired, but not exhausted. Cramps, but I think those are "I need to poop cramps", definitely no change in the boobs, and no spotting.

I just take it as it comes. If AF doesn't show up, then I'll use a test. I can't justify peeing on something that is the equivalent of a Starbucks when the truth will reveal itself the day after.

Kim said...

I hope you got good news!!! If not, keep trying, girl. Onward and upward!

And yes, why are preggo tests SO expensive?

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